{self} Intimacy

Intimacy is complex;

It is concentrated focus

It is honesty

It is acceptance

It is recognition

As a friend explained, when discussing his definition of intimacy, a lot of people are looked at but never seen.

Intimacy is seeing, actually seeing.

Intimacy is often associated with romantic relationship. Which is partially why there is so much confusion around, and lack of, it.

Often, because of this correlation, intimacy is reserved only for when a commitment is made (or as a strategy in the pursuit of commitment).

This way of application is a disservice for all other types of relationships; family, friendships, acquaintances, strangers, and especially, self.

Love and intimacy are both complex ideas and both closely related. In regards to self, intimacy is not self love in the material action sense (bubble baths, candles, face masks, and whatever other products use those hashtags on their platforms) rather, self love is a tool to catalyze self intimacy.

The thought behind and the focus during any self love action is self intimacy. I suppose intimacy can be almost thought of as a verb then.

There are certainly many layers of self. Spending time getting to listen to and experience some of the subtler pieces that are often overlooked is a similar process to getting to know a potential lover. Most of the thoughts we hear are the same ones we always do because it’s a familiar way of seeing and thinking about the world and how we relate to it. But, there are softer voices that can have very different things to say that can only be heard when we take the time to be quiet.

Concentrated movement is a form of self intimacy. It is an exploration of capabilities, edges, and current conditions of the physical self. It is a chance to observe how the internal environment is influenced by the external- an opportunity to see; when judgement arises, how you respond to discomfort, and where acceptance is felt.

Seeing and accepting someone is an intimate experience

Being seen and accepted by someone is an intimate experience.

Both, seeing and being seen with acceptance by your self is an intimate experience.